Good News Bible

Here’s a new Good News. So toss your old Good News Bible out of the window.

This crucial picture is a piece of memorabilia that allows me to make real nasty things. It’s taken 14th August 1988 in Merlin Hotel, Malacca.

I was standing in the middle, receiving the oh, the Almighty Water Baptism, a ceremony leaded by the Pastor Richard Ng K. K., the pastor of an Assembly of God (AOG) church, called Saving Grace (don’t confuse it with my name).

Pastor Richard was the so-called handsome, but pig-squashed faced guy that was standing on the left, who conducted the entire ceremony of Water Baptism for the church that year.

And what happened to him in the later years? Around year 2000, I met a fellow church member in the night market. And you know whut he told me? Whoa! The ultra-Godliness Pastor Richard Ng had torn his underwear into two – he dumped his wife and daughter FOR another woman! What a screaming headline! I told him I’d loveeeee to hear more.

He continues. Several years back, Pastor Richard had stripped his pastoral robe and put on a smart business suit and tie, and had started a business on his own. Accordingly, he was doing well. But strangely, he hadn’t divorced his wife yet. He lived blissfully (and lustfully) with his mistress. And his hapless wife? She was still attending the same church (which had moved to a new location, under a new name). So his wife was singing Hal-le-lu-jah…! in the church, while Pastor Richard was moaning Uh-ah-uh-ah…! on the bed with his mistress.

That’s all from the former church member. Another hair-raising news. An aunt told me, another church member had actually saw Pastor Richard and his mistress in the Bridal Gallery, probably choosing wedding tuxedo and gown. When she called him, he and his mistress speed-fled away like wild hogs! Whoa, more exciting than Korean dramas.

So, I sweetly recalled the past, when I was attending Pastor Richard’s Sunday services, listening to his Holy Sermons. The Gospel screaming, the Bible thumping, the powerful anointing, the fire and brimstones threatening, all from his pulpit-smashing. His cheeks turned redder than tomatoes and his saliva showered heavier than monsoon rain. More fondly, his sermons on adultery – all adulterers and adulteresses were Devils that would be thrown into Hell.

So now Pastor Richard himself had become the greatest Biblical King that bonking the foxy Biblical babe. His Hell had suddenly become Heaven. And Heaven was soooo ecstatic and erogenous and that he quickly removed his Saint’s mask and wore his original Lucifer’s face. No wonder.

Now branching out from Pastor Richard’s story. Predestinated by God, the matronly Christian woman that I wrote about in my posting The Whore of Babylon Strikes Back, was in the congregation. In the late 80s, both she and I religiously attending Pastor Richard’s Sunday services in church. Her opinion on Pastor Richard’s tragedy was that his wife ‘looked like that’ (means unattractive), and that was the reason he discarded her.

I made the psychological observation while she was talking to me, with her usual Holier-than-thou style. And the detected results are:
1. Her expressions were telling me that her own marriage was threatened, being terrified of Pastor Richard’s Saint to Satan tragedy.
2. Her sub-consciousness was telling me that she believed her looks were actually a mirror reflection of Pastor Richard’s wife.
3. Her age which was 5 years older than her husband had created intense fear in her, in which was telling me her worst nightmare was her husband would become the predecessor of Pastor Richard.
4. Her calculating tendency of her own of signs of aging, her middle-age Auntie Wong’s looks, her old-fashioned sense of style were telling me how serious her inner insecurity was. Serious enough to feel her trembles that turned into furious temper. Well, didn’t God ever tell her that EVERYONE will grow old and ugly one day?

So, wanna see more hypocrites? Go to any Assembly of God churches.